Giving Up On God {part one}

I remember the day I gave up on God. I held the phone to my ear while angry, hot tears streamed silently down my face.  As I listened and realized that I had been lied to for months by those closest to me, I made a rash and defiant decision.  If no one was looking out for me, I was going to have to look out for myself. I gently depressed the button on the phone so that my grandmother would not know I had listened in and started to pray. Prayer was an automatic response to crisis for me.  Prayer had been my constant companion in my brief 13 years on the earth. This time the prayers felt empty.  It was as if my heart's cries were not being heard and I determined God must not be any more trustworthy than the rest of the adults in my life.  Right then, in that moment, hurt and confused I … [Read more...]

My plans, His plans

Does he who disciplines nations not punish? Does he who teaches mankind lack knowledge?  The LORD knows all human plans; he knows that they are futile.  Blessed is the one you discipline, LORD, the one you teach from your law...~ Psalm 94: 10-12 My plan was to be in Glen Spey, New York this week with 20+ teen mama's and their babies for YoungLives camp. My plan was to be much further along in the recovery process {from the knee surgery of July 11th} Those were not God's plans for me this week. Rarely are my plans His plans.  And, I am learning to be okay with that. I used to kick and scream {literally and figuratively} at God when my plans were thwarted.  I used to try to follow through with my plans despite the clear evidence they were not His plans.  I have come to surrender to His … [Read more...]

Wordless Wednesday- me and my precious Mommom

My grandmotherYou can join in the Wordless Wednesday fun here and here … [Read more...]

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