Wifey Wednesday- Comparison

Today, Sheila at To Love, Honor and Vacuum is tackling the dangerous tendency we ladies have of comparing our husbands to other men/husband’s out there (or even worse characters in romance novels and movies)

I have fallen into this trap before.  Thinking how nice it would be if my hubby was more “romantic” like Jack or more “in tune with my needs” like Bob or more “outgoing” like Jim.

Hmmm, selfish much?

Because here is the thing…when we wish or daydream about our husband being someone or something other than who he is we are, in essence, telling God that He didn’t do a good enough job in choosing and creating our mate.

It is truly a matter of perspective.

When I choose to be thankful for the man God gave me I am more apt to notice the ways He is perfect for me.  Trust me, not just any guy could live with me!

He is patient.

He is calm.

He is the one that holds my kite strings so I can soar yet not fly away.

He is the one that can handle my intense emotion without taking it personally.

He is the one that thinks things through before giving an answer.

He is the one who holds my heart.

He is the one that takes that privilege seriously.

God knew what He was doing when He made Mike. i know that God made him with me in mind and vice versa. I have no doubt that we were meant to be together.  A team.   Two becoming one and together living out God’s purpose for our lives.

Avoid the trap of the enemy that is comparison.  Instead, ask God to open your eyes to the gift that lies next to you every night.


  1. My friend, I could have written this exact same thing about Scott. He believes in me … encourages me … and is completely at ease with both my success and my failure … He loves the Lord wholly and loves me passionately … what a precious gift!

  2. So well said! I have found that when I allow myself to dwell on my husband's shortcomings, my attitude toward him easily becomes negative. I have been blessed with a wonderful husband and should remind myself often to be thankful for all that he does for our family.

  3. Melissa, I would have to agree with you. I can remember growing up, it was always talked about how “peer pressure” was effecting the youth. I can't really say I remember being “effected”. I think I was pretty much saved from a lot of that as my parents really sacrificed to send me to a Christian School, most of my friends were in my church youth group and so on. However, today is a different story. What isn't effecting our “youth” is effecting us! I have never, in all my years, seen the peer pressure going on in churches. Where the woman of the church get together and discuss “hot” actors, men with great abs and actually express a “wish list” of physical attribute they wish their husbands had! One thing that I think adds to this could be some of the Christian Romance books out there. It creates a fantasy world that some women already have trouble with…and perhaps takes it a step further from fiction to actual coveting. I love Christian Fiction, but because of this, do my best to stay away from Christian Romance. As humans, we have enough trouble not picking each other apart, finding all the faults, and becoming discontent in relationships. But focusing on the attributes that the Lord tells us to focus on as stressed in Philippians 4:8 such as what is true, pure, honest, just and so-on about our husbands helps us to keep the right perspective! Thank you SO much for your article and reminding us of the blessing the Lord has given to us as Godly wives.

    • very true..we do put a lot of pressure on each other Debbie. and you are
      right, we should be building each other up! (and our marriages)

  4. amen! God more than knew what He was doing when He gave us the men He chose for us!

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