Wifey Wednesday- What do you wish you had known?

The question posed today for Wifey Wednesday is this: what do you wish you had known before you got married?

I think having read the book, The Five Love Languages, prior to getting married would have helped Mike and I tremendously in the first few years. We both did not know how to give or receive love very well, due to childhood junk. We both did not trust love, either. And, to top that off with speaking ENTIRELY different love languages, let’s suffice it to say we misunderstood each other a lot!

I can laugh now but there were times that arguments over who was going to do the dishes ended up being really hurtful because we both lacked adequate communication skills and had our guards up so high.

Thankfully, we stuck it out and learned how to communicate better. That is not to say that we don’t totally not get each other at times but we both make much more of an effort to make sure the other truly understands what we mean by something. I think so many people give up before they get to the good stuff in marriage. If they would just stick it out, invite God in the center of it all and love one another, they would get to reap the benefits of their labor.

Communication differences- if you are unmarried- consider yourself warned 🙂 Oh, and I wish someone had warned me about flatulence. Daggone!


  1. I’ve got that book on my to-read list, I think I might bump it up in the queue sooner. I wish I had known how my husband really communicates, I’m just learning. Siiigh.

  2. Jen-After the alter says:

    I read Dr. Robin Smith’s book “lies at the alter” I didn’t get all the way through it but a big thing I learned is “what you see is what you get” It is so easy but so true. People normally don’t totally change, so who you marry is who they always were…that’s a big one for me.


  3. Melissa, Multi-Tasking Mama says:

    Jo- Definitely bump it up- it’s great for understanding your kids too!

    Jen- that is so true! People need to be themselves when dating and accept the other instead of loving the fantasy of who they could become…just sets you up to be disappointed

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